Far From Plain Jane

austen-darcy

Oh Jane Austen…how ardently we admire and love you still…

Fun Fact for you Folks: 16 December 2016 would have been Jane Austen’s 241st birthday if she was alive today. Sadly, she only reached the age of 41, but on the upside I don’t fancy knowing what she would have look like if she had lived those extra 200 years (though I’m thinking it would probably be along the lines of Bilbo Baggins after Frodo took the One Ring away from him and moseyed off towards Mordor…)

Despite her untimely demise, I would venture to assert that it is a truth universally acknowledged that Jane Austen is one of the best loved writers (in English) the world has known — and will ever know. But rather than praising Austen’s elegant prose, or admiring her artistic longevity, or extolling her virtues as a social commentator, or waxing lyrical over her well-honed and even-better-aimed wit, I thought the occasion of her 241st birthday could be better spent considering something completely different.

What would Jane Austen make of the world of 2016?

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Has anything really changed? Would any of us turn down the opportunity to live at Pemberley?

What would she have made of selfies, and status updates, and social media? Would she have embraced technology and been right at the cutting edge of social commentary, garnering thousands of Likes with every carefully-worded comment, or would she have been far more circumspect — and perhaps chosen to email an errant niece privately, for example, to warn her that having viewed her Facebook feed that she would be receiving suitably decorous clothing and the Oxford English Dictionary for Christmas?

Would Jane Austen have usurped J K Rowling as the undisputed Queen of the Twittersphere? Would she have taken the view that if you can’t say it in 140 characters you’d be best not to say it at all, or would she have been entirely too polite to tweet?

Would she have taken part in the seemingly endless conversation regarding real estate (which, in the face of sky rocketing property values, has become something of a national pastime here in Australia)? It seems reasonable to suppose that she might — given that Netherfield Park being let at last was such big news in Pride and Prejudice  — or would dear Jane deem such discussion to be too crass in a modern world so obsessed with resale values?

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The sad syndrome that besets Austen fans of every Persuasion…ahem…

 

What would Miss Austen make of the many film and television adaptations of her novels, or of their various parodies,or of the ones that even feature zombies? Would she wade into the debate over who made the best Mr Darcy — was it Laurence Olivier? Colin Firth? Matthew MacFadyen? Elliot Cowan?

What would she think of Bridget Jones?

(What, I wonder, would she make of Donald Trump?)

And, speaking of catastrophes, would she care to comment on the so-called “Austen-Induced Disillusionment Cycle” and its effects on fans around the globe?

Would Jane Austen ever Swipe Right? Or would she counsel her fellow singletons to stay away from Tinder, perhaps suggesting — gently, of course — that while Mr Wickham’s profile picture might be ever so attractive, it may not provide the full measure of the man?

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I am, and will remain, eternally grateful that Mr Collins never got Instagram…

Would she use a Kindle, or would she remain the sort of person for whom only paper and ink would do? Would she share the iTunes playlist of the music she listened to while she wrote? Would she continue to write longhand, in her elegant handwriting, or would she use a computer — and, if she did, Jane Austen be a Mac User or PC Girl?

Would Jane Austen blog?!

Oh, just imagine that for one glorious moment…

I know I would follow her until the end of time if she did. But in the meantime, to celebrate her 241st birthday, I think I’ll go and re-read Pride and Prejudice for the twenty-seventh time instead.

PS: This one’s for my Dad, who handed me my first Austen...

Dirt Music

 

Dirt Music 3

Dancing spotlit in a bodystocking? Not me…I’ll leave that to the likes of Misty Copeland.

So the other night, after a few “light beers” (which may or may not have been entire bottles of wine), a mate of mine asked me whether I had a Favourite Book.

As in, a Favourite Book OF ALL TIME.

And I said…Yes.

Or perhaps I just whispered it.

I definitely held my breath for a split second before I answered, not sure of how my response would be received, or whether it would be treated with the reverence I reserve for Favourite Books.

Because let’s face it — owning up to having a Favourite Book (of All Time, no less) is to to reveal your self, to expose your self as completely and unapologetically as a dancer in a flesh-coloured bodysuit on a spotlit stage.  Which is fine, completely fine, if you’ve spent the requisite years honing your body and your skills to the point that a body-stocking, or a distinct lack of on-stage hiding places, or (God forbid) an audience no longer fazes you, but…clearly, that’s not me.

I write. I read.

I cook. I most definitely eat. And while my kitchen is well-known as a place where dancing is heartily encouraged, I would sooner eat a body-stocking rather than wear one.

Even so, despite my many misgivings (or maybe because I, too, had consumed several glasses of wine), the other night I actually confessed to loving one book above all others.

Now, any literature lover will tell you that the idea of narrowing down the books you couldn’t bear to part with to a Top Ten is an utterly absurd exercise. If you truly love books, whittling down your list to a Top Fifty is a difficult proposition.

But if you have a Favourite Book, you know what it is. If, unlike me, you’re the sort of person who likes to proclaim your Favourite Book far and wide and to encourage every last being in the known universe to read it, you know what it is. If, like me, you’re a little more circumspect about revealing the identity of your Favourite Book, you know what it is. Even if you have trouble admitting to yourself that one particular volume is your Favourite Book, you still know what it is.

And mine is Tim Winton’s Dirt Music.

Dirt Music

So here it is — my Favourite Book. OF ALL TIME.

(Oh dear Lord! Did I just type that for the world to see?!)

Yep, Dirt Music is my Favourite Book of All Time.

And I have decided that I will own up to it, and expose myself to whatever judgements you may make about me as a result of that admission, because it is my Favourite Book.

I could have dodged the issue entirely, perhaps, and said it was impossible to decide between Dirt Music and any number of other books, such as Pride and Prejudice or Anna Karenina or The Lord of the Rings or The Great Gatsby or Hamlet, to name just a handful of others.  No authors’ names necessary, of course — they’re all tomes that are regularly cited as being Favourite Books. I could even have wrong-footed my friend by pointing him in the direction of Ursula Le Guin’s Earthsea books, or Marilynne Robinson’s Gilead, or Vikram Seth’s A Suitable Boy or  Jonathan Safran Foer’s Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close.

But I didn’t.

Because, deep down, I know that Dirt Music is my Favourite Book.

I’m not saying that it’s best book in the universe — that’s a whole other discussion. And I’m definitely not going to weigh into the whole debate about the Great Australian Novel, either, and whether that accolade goes to Winton’s Cloudstreet or not.  I’m not even saying that you should rush out, buy Dirt Music, and devour it cover to cover — it may not be your thing at all. (I mean, if you want to, of course — go ahead; it might end up being your Favourite Book too).

Nup. I’m not doing any of that.

But what I am saying is pretty simple, really.

For me, Dirt Music, Winton’s tale of Georgie Jutland losing and finding herself in the wilds and waters of Western Australia is special. In the true blue, Bruce McAvaney sense of the word.

I love — no, I utterly adore — Tim Winton’s prose.  I love the tangible physicality of his descriptions of people and place. I love the accuracy with which he captures his characters’ vernacular. I love the overarching presence of the Australian landscape, particularly of the ocean and the coast. I love the way he describes Georgie’s father as Himself, QC — and I love the sheer volume of information and resonance and impact those two words impart.

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My super-power: escaping into books…

Reading is such a great privilige, and literacy such an inordinately important gift. And, as Alain de Botton points out, “Of all the addictions, bibliophilia is the noblest and most dangerous.” Where else, but between the pages of books, can we embark on great quests, fight revolutions, ride dragons, or sail further west than west?

I will, I know, continue to read, and always — always — to write. Like Rudyard Kipling, “I am by nature a dealer in words, and words are the most powerful drug known to humanity.”

And it is beyond comforting to know that I can return time and again to the happy places that lie between the dog-eared volumes that line my shelves, to wend my way along hidden paths towards Rivendell, to walk with Elizabeth from Netherfield back to Longbourn, even to hold my breath as Anna waits for the oncoming train…

But I will always come back, time and again, to Dirt Music, if only to discover, like Luther Fox, just one last time:

She’s real…she’s real…